Gloomy Monday

Can you ever imagine that you know you’re doing a sin but you keep doing that because in fact, you enjoy it and feel comfortable with that??
For example, you’ve build this wall between your father because you know you’ve bad experience with him (maybe he beats you once in a while when he is drunk or else), and when he said sorry, you keep make a distance to keep your comfort zone…
Contoh lainnya mungkin lo tau mandi 2 hari sekali itu buruk untuk kesehatan, tapi demi untuk kenyamanan lo sendiri dan tentunya penghematan, lo tetap melakukan hal itu?
Well, ya.. it’s a beautiful sin.. 😛

That’s a post from August 20, 2013
2 years ago.

Yes, i’m still keep a distance from my dad.
Didn’t want to get any trouble from him. And live on my own. Am happy for myself.

Last night, i recieved an email from one of my dad’s employee. My dad is sick, and now he is on the hospital. Resting.
He is tired, maybe. I’m not asking why.
I don’t even reply the email. Just leave it there.

Honestly, i do confused. Reply it or not, either it will make any different, or simply make it worse, i just don’t know.

One question can lead into a thousands possibility. And i can’t help it but to think about those possibility last night in my sleep.

I knew i love my dad as a child love his super hero. But on the other side, he also my deepest and darkest fear as long as i can remember.
He is a shadow of my mom, whenever she is on light, he is around, but can not be seen.

That email bring back some of my childhood memories; like why i don’t want to live with him anymore after my mom passed away.

Can’t say much, but i hope he’ll be alright..

 

 

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About BrokenInfinity8

There's no 'forever'... The infinite is already broken. View all posts by BrokenInfinity8

4 responses to “Gloomy Monday

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